Friday, June 5, 2009

Tabloids Are a Waste of Time

Tabloid magazines have become an immensely popular trend, especially here in the United States. I am not referring to alternative newspapers such as the Tampa Bay Times, which actually publishes respectable articles. I speak here of the so-called "gutter press," the sensationalist wastes of space. This trend disturbs me on many levels. I don't even know where to start.

Such gossip publications as The National Enquirer, Star and The Globe are a collective insult to journalism. Writers who have apparently been educated enough to get legitimate work have resorted to penning false rumors of Olsen twin pregnancies and Bob Barker death hoaxes. If they wanted to write news, I'm sure they could find places where actual news is reported regularly. If they wanted to write comedy, they could just submit 100 scripts to CBS and hope they at least get a table read. And if they wanted to gossip, they could just text their friends. People who may have a talent for this field are simply throwing it all away.

These magazines, whose paper would have been better served in the forest where it was called "trees," are front and center at nearly every checkout counter at grocery and department stores. In line, I care about how much my Gatorade costs and telling the cashier that plastic is fine, not the latest "breaking news" on Michelle Obama's college sorority life. I might pick up a package of Starburst, but never a tabloid. It's quite embarrassing to see them en masse in every line, getting more exposure than the actual newspapers. USA Today is hidden past the counters in the front of the store in case you want something of substance.

In addition, tabloids are quite irresponsible in their reporting. The National Enquirer gets sued seemingly on a weekly basis. Reporting false allegations of alcohol abuse, infidelity or suicide about anyone, celebrity or not, is just never right. The publishers probably churn out half their profits in legal fees and settlements, which they should. Nobody would want to be slandered on what looks like a real news magazine, where others may believe what is written. If it were serious enough, I know I would sue.

The problem -- which may soon be termed an epidemic -- stems from the people who pay money to read this crap. When faced with competing headlines "Obama Nominates Judge" and "Britney Gains Weight," millions sadly choose the latter. I don't get how so many people can be tooled into taking this seriously. There are much bigger things going on in the world than what is told in tabloids. Things that are real and may actually change the world. Yet people keep flushing their money into this pit and debating about rumors some attention-seeking editor made up. The obsession with tabloids and their phony headlines is just dumbfounding.

I don't see why tabloid magazines should exist. The entertainment world is entertaining us enough as it is. These people just drag it down.

But do you know what are even worse? Tabloid websites and TV shows. But that could be a future rant.

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